The Reparenting your inner child Process

The Reparenting process is the technique that I use in most of my teachings and healing sessions. It is a simple process used to take care of your inner child. That unique part of you that is waiting for your affection and that is waiting for you to be there.

Reparenting your inner child

When you feel disconnected from your inner child you will probably experience: 

  • An incapacity to connect to your desires
  • A tendency to avoid or suppress your emotions, sometimes by the use of different addictions (substances, phone or social media, unhealthy relationships)
  • Tasks accomplished in automated pilot mode
  • Hyperactivity to feel fulfilled (you are overdoing and feeling tired at the end of the day)
  • A sensation of numbness, apathy, loneliness. Joy is only here when you are extremely stimulated or surrounded by people you love
  • A sense of resentment and betrayal towards others as a result of not being able to take care of your own needs
  • The expectation that you are going to be taken care of or rescued by someone (government, parents, partners…)
  • A pattern of being in unhealthy relationships or with emotionally unavailable partners as a mirror of your emotional unavailability for yourself

All those situations that can also be a part of different diagnosis, are also the result of this disconnection. It occurs when your basic emotional needs weren’t meet as a child. If you experienced neglect, codependency, or abuse, there is still this child in need inside of you, waiting for a reparation. But since we are subconsciously seeking for our most absent parent in others (to repair our wounds), it is more likely that we are going to attract friends and partners that share some characteristics of our caregivers.

In every adult there is a child wondering what happened.

The Reparenting Process to create healthier relationships

If you try to manifest a healthy relationship from those wounds, if you are in the energy of need, let me tell you that you are unlikely to attract a long-term partner that is going to meet your needs. Because that is your job to become your sacred parent and to take care of that child. You are an adult now, you have the power and ability to answer to your desires.

And once you are in alignment with your Truth, here is what happens:

  • You know what your desires are in life and you can make conscious decisions towards your goals
  • You feel safe to feel your emotions as you are now validating them when they arise
  • You take time to connect to yourself every day and you know that this connection is the most important
  • You know your standards, how you want to be treated, and what you no longer accept in relationships (and suddenly here are the healthy partners!)
  • You are aware of your values and you know how to set boundaries
  • You are seeking for a sacred partnership! Not just someone that can “meet your needs” since you are aware of how to take care of yourself
  • You trust your decision making and you are following your joy and intuition
  • You feel guided and know that you are going to attract the right situations and people for you

The Reparenting Process to open to your truth

In other terms, what you are aligning with is the energy of the Soulmate. You are bringing this self-respect, abundance, honor in your experience. Because this is how you are choosing to treat yourself. This is the result of the Reparenting Process. 

The Reparenting Process is divided into three simple parts : 

  • Connecting 

Before you can work with your inner children, you need to meet them. It means that you are connecting to who you were when a situation in your life started when a point of trauma occurred when something didn’t happen the way you wanted to. It doesn’t matter if you don’t exactly remember as want we want is to reach an emotional state. To learn how to connect with your inner child, click here, there is a free meditation and a free 7 days workbook to work on this connection. 

  • Reframing 

The second part of the Reparenting Process is called Reframing. In this exercise, we are going to replace your memory with a more empowering one. We are going to resolve the inner conflict, heal what happened to you, simply by allowing yourself to feel and to let go. If you are carrying the burden of your past, this becomes heavy. You might have built a lot of your identity on a particular event so be patient as it can take more sessions to completely let go of it. Be gentle with yourself, we are learning compassion and forgiveness here. I recommend working on yourself with a dedicated notebook. You are building a relationship with yourself here, consider it as love letters. 

To know more about Reframing while doing Shadow Work Journaling, watch this video 

  • Aligning 

The last part of The Reparenting Process is “Aligning” and aligning occurs when you are replacing the truth over a situation. What do you want your life to be? What didn’t happen in your past that you wished for? How can you give to yourself what wasn’t given to you? What actions can you take from that space of alignment? 

I teach how to align with yourself in my inner circle on Facebook. This is free and you can enjoy meditations, training, and get some guidance. Join the community! 

Learn how to Reparent your inner child in simple steps!

Of course, The Reparenting Process may sound complicated when you are not used to it. Reparenting your inner child is a full-time job that doesn’t look like a job when you learn how to do it on daily basis. This becomes easy, natural. And your reality suddenly changes.

If you want to learn the Reparenting Process, join my 12 weeks program “Love is the First Step” starting on October 21st, 2020. If you want to try the Private Sessions first, go right here.


I am Héra, Spiritual teacher and intuitive healer and the Creator of Love Is the First Step. My purpose is to bring joy and peace in your relationships through a journey to self-love. 

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